Circles

The days are long, but the years are short!

For some daft reason, I will start with an apology for ghosting you readers for most part of the year gone. Indeed, the days were long (extraordinaire); and before we knew it, the year gone. But was it that short?

Mathematically speaking, 2020 lasted approximately 24 months and 969 years. In religious language, this translates to all the suns and moons that Methuselah lived through. Financially, it was a year of lean returns and socially, the interactions were (close to ) nil for the better part of the year. And yet we lived through it and are part of a generation that will live to  tell other generations all about it. Shall we raise our glasses in gratitude? It was undeniably a unique year and we learnt (rather quickly) that there was always a different way of doing things. That it was possible to press a pause button on calendars and timelines because health came before all else. That it was possible to actually work remotely and that probably, social gatherings were overrated. In all these, we rethought strategies and reorganized plans because at the end of the day, life had to go on.

Earlier today, I was put on the spot to give my colleagues one of my new year resolutions. It caught me off guard, and yeap, you guessed right- I had no concrete resolutions this year. At least not yet. It therefore took me by surprise that I responded almost immediately with ease.

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I would like to expand my circle of influence this year.  I want to be more proactive and less reactive to the factors and circumstances that concern me. To maintain a positive attitude, to be good energy to those around me and to be deliberate on how negativity affects my mindset and inner peace. No panic attacks, no negative vibes, no raised or broken voices….

I meant it. It has been on the top of my mind lately. I had an exchange with a vendor a while back, which made me promise me that I would never again get to that level of exasperation over factors outside of me. Thinking about it now, it astonishes me just how annoyed her misinterpretation of my instructions had made me. It astonishes me because many a times, we also miss the mark. We deviate and expect others to be understanding enough to calmly correct us.

I chose from that moment, therefore, to place the same bar I set for myself on those around me.

To let my inner state of mind determine my reactions to the external matters. Not to let myself have a bad day just because something bad happened.

Ps. The circle of influence seeks to expand one’s reactive nature and attitudes towards external factors. It calls us to focus our energy and attention where it counts, on the things over which we have influence. As you focus on things within your Circle of Influence, it will expand. Give it a try 😊

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In other news, we got married!!!.   I am learning how to see me as a wife and him as a husband; terms that I have faithfully been looking up lately. (Of course, there is not much that the internet has no offer). I occasionally ask him what these terms mean to him because I like to get a clear picture of expectations early on. His answers are a little more than what the internet would offer… but not more than what a fervent newly wedded *MAN*  would say. And so I realize that we will learn the ropes on the go; and here’s to figuring it out along the way graciously.

Speaking of which, I have been looking for ‘The meaning of Marriage’ by Timothy Keller for many many months. Anyone knows where I can get a copy?

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“In our perfect ways. In the ways we are beautiful. In the ways we are human. We are here. Happy New Year. Let’s make it ours.” —Beyonce